Consulting a professional

Ok, so I realize I was getting way too detailed about all the early development stuff.  The idea was to point out the early indicators of her sensory issues, but I think it was getting awfully boring.  So, let's get to the point, right?

Katie's 3rd birthday, overwhelmed.

So the point was, Katie became a real little handful, and I was at a loss to know what to do about it.  I felt like a fool, because this is supposed to be my field, my area of knowledge, and I was failing miserably.  I took Katie to a child psychologist the week after her 3rd birthday, and we saw her for a few months, but she couldn't pinpoint any particular diagnosis that fit either. She mentioned a referral for an occupational therapy assessment, but I guess I sort of brushed that off, as I didn't really understand what that had to do with anything.

Sometimes I wondered if this problem was all in my head.  Maybe this was just Kate's personality.  Maybe I was just dropping the ball as a single parent.  Rob never seemed to have these sort of issues with her behavior. Maybe I was just too easy on her and needed to get tough.  Maybe I was just lazy.  Maybe being in this profession I was seeing "symptoms" were there really were none.  Maybe.  But I just didn't think so.  After all, I wasn't really parenting that much differently than I had with Melanie.  Sure they're different kids, but the same principles should still apply.  Yes, toddlers are difficult, sure they have tantrums, but something about this just seemed over the top.  She was so intense, so over reactive, and she couldn't seem to get over things like a 'normal' kid would.

At the time Kate was having terrible separation anxiety when it was time to go to her father's house for his weekends. Rob had moved in with his girlfriend Mary about a year after leaving our home, and she has two sons of her own.  I'd met Mary and she seemed to really care for the girls, and her sons were both very sweet to them.  But each week Katie would cry all through the drive up there, and then clung to me screaming when I tried to hand her to Rob.  I eventually insisted on him getting her out of the car seat himself so she couldn't get a hold of me.  I cried every time as I drove away.  It was torture!